Lots of good reasons

Today marks exactly six months since we committed to Tavin through Reeces Rainbow and started our home study through a home study agency. This month also marks 1 year since I found Reece's Rainbow through another families blog. I wish I could remember the exact date-I just know it was the day right after we confidently told my family we were planning to adopt, but that it would be "a healthy child under 1" because that seemed like the logical choice. 

In case you aren't aware we never set out with the intention of adopting a child with medical needs. Funny how God takes our best laid plans and leads us in ways that we never expected. I would not trade any of the last year-even the months of soul searching last summer as we faced a lot of selfish reasons why we shouldn't consider adopting a child with medical needs. I think it's important for other families to hear who may be just starting out on their own journey, who may face the same internal debates-it's normal. Wrestle it out.  We had lots of good reasons to adopt a "healthy" child. If I listed them all you would probably think I'm the most selfish person ever. They were all "us centered" for sure. I certainly had never felt so selfish in my life. But the more we researched and prayed the less valid those reasons became...the main question became "why not us?" And for that there was no good answer. 

Mark 5:17-22 tells of a rich young ruler who, despite all he had, knew he was missing something. He had all the ease and comfort he could want but yet was lacking. Jesus looked on him and loved him, then asked him to sacrifice what was most dear-the comfortable and familiar. Jesus asked him to give up a life of ease. The man was disheartened and went away sorrowful. Jesus extended an invitation in love, knowing the sacrifice would be nothing compared to the reward of following Jesus. Jesus didn't force him to follow-he extended an invitation to a life he knew would bring incredible blessing (eternal blessing, not physical) and left the decision in the young mans court. 

The Lord spoke through that story to us when we were praying about whether to step out and commit to Tavin last September. I fully believe we could have turned away from Tavin and I believe God would have brought him another family. But we would have been the ones missing out on one of the greatest blessings to come our way. 

Here we are visiting daily the most precious little soul. A small soul hidden away from the world. A blessing that we almost missed out on. I shudder to think how easy it would have been to say no. We will never regret saying yes.

The post we've been dying to share!

So we've been sitting on a little secret, but we are ready to share! We got The Call we had been waiting for March 14, and had to fly out March 18 to have our first appointment to view Tavin's file on March 20! Needless to say its been a whirlwind ever since.

We met our sweet little boy on March 24th. He is precious in every single way. I just can't even tell you how much we adore him! We've been visiting daily since.

 (We are waiting to post pics of his face till after court-so get ready for a long picture post afterwards!) 

Please pray for us as we have court this coming Wednesday morning, the judge here is pro adoption, and known to conduct his adoption proceedings as if he were sitting across the table sharing coffee. He has been known to ask such questions as "who is your favorite super hero and why? I see your birthday is such-and-such date, what others events have happened on that date? What is your city known for?" Etc. I am not good at thinking on my feet so this makes me a little nervous. Haha. Definitely preferable to a mean judge though!

Ok if you've been dying to hear how our first meeting went, here is part of my journal entry from that special day:

3/24/14

We arrived at the orphanage this morning and waited in a room that looked like it would have been more comfortable in the '70's. lime green wall paper covered the walls above wooden paneling and a lace curtain hangs over the window. We sit on a green worn leather sectional that surrounds a small wooden coffee table topped with a red plaid woven placemat. On two walls are large poster boards covered with pictures of previously adopted children from this orphanage. From the room next door comes the sound of children singing, having a music lesson. Adorable.

We are told they are ready for us to meet Tavin and walk out to another building, the one that houses children with special needs. We go through a room where a woman is giving a PowerPoint to a group of nannies, and ring the bell to his groupa. I'm thinking "he has been living on the other side of this wall for the last two years. This very wall right here!" We are ushered into the entry room, and our facilitator speaks with the nanny. My stomach does flips like on a roller coaster. Then here here he is! Here are his chipmunk cheeks, rosebud mouth, distinct ears, and deep eyes. And he's not a dream, he's a real live boy. A little boy laying his shoulder on the matronly nannies shoulder, as she and another nanny animatedly tell us what a sweet boy he is..that he is their favorite. They say "we love him so much we say pour love will will bring him a family! And here you are!" He is perfectly adorable. 

The nannies volunteer all kind of info, like a proud mama, no doubt trying to seal the deal, as if we need any urging. 

The nanny swoops him low to the ground to chase a toy car and has him laughing, a deep little throaty laugh.

After a few minutes I ask if we can have a picture with him and the nanny hands him over. I feel the weight of this real, live boy in my arms. He twists towards the nanny but doesn't cry or seem overly alarmed, he's more interested in trying to get the phone from our facilitator. Phones always rank high with toddlers and he's no exception.

We will be able to visit with him twice a day for 1.5 hours each time.

We obviously haven't scratched the surface in any kind of bonding but for our first visit we couldn't have been happier! God certainly answered our prayers in so many ways.